God Doesn't Give You More Than You Can Handle!

The title of this post.

I just read an article from Autism Daddy written in June 2011, and he have just re-shared it on Facebook.

God doesn't give more than you can handle!

I have heard this oh so many times. As a Muslim, I have to believe in this statement and be peace with it.

Yes, I really want to believe in it although I am not sure whether it's entirely true especially seeing so many daddies run away after they had a child with autism. Leaving the mother to take care of the child on her own. It is heartless. Half of the genetic code comes from you, jerk!

In a playground earlier today, I overheard an elderly man talking about something but I captured a phrase quite clearly, "we're human too", while puffing a kretek cigarette at the playground 3-meters from children playing there. I hate people who does this.

As humans, we sometimes yell to #1. Especially me.

We realize we're humans. Reading about it and hearing about it from other people that they sometimes yell to their autistic kid somehow makes it feel better, just for a while.

Why, because we know sometimes he can't help doing he does. We know he doesn't understand the basic concepts of life. We know he doesn't understand action and consequences. We know he doesn't understand why what he is doing annoys us, or what actually annoys us.

Because #1 is not severe, we forget all the time that he is autistic and as parents we expect him to be better. We forget, son. Not that we don't love you. We're just human. We're sorry.

The guilt sometimes consumes me. I feel guilty yelling, I feel guilty taking a break by watching movies with your mom, I feel guilty not being able to respond to you while I am working at home and you have no clue what I am doing.

We aren't superhuman and we aren't perfect. What we are doing is try to take care of you and provide the best for you as much as we can.

Do I know why God gives this to us to handle? We don't. All we know that God always has God's own reasons...

- Abah